I just finished watching the movie "Pursuit of Happyness" and am stunned at what a powerful movie it is, and how empowering it could potentially be. I'm one of the lucky ones; I do not work, and yet I am assured that every first of the month, I will have a paycheck deposited in my account, no matter what, short of nuclear armageddon. It isn't a lot, but it's sufficient for my needs, which are few (food, a heated, lit roof over my head, and books). I have enough for some luxuries, like caffeine and artisan bread once in a while, but it's not enough to ever really consider going anywhere on vacation or anything. Every attempt to save money always ends in failure, because there's always another bill around the corner. It amazes me at how much more expensive it is to live in one part of the country as compared to another. In Michigan our gas, electric, phone, television bills, etc., were positively meager compared to down here in southern Wisconsin. Everything costs more down here - a LOT more.
Wait, wait.... I'm not complaining. (Sure sounded like it though, didn't it?) Someday I would like to be able to take a trip to the West Coast to see my son, or to the East Coast to see my other son, and it's just not going to happen unless I get off my duff and do something. There was a line in the movie tonight that really resonated with me: Chris Gardner said that when he was in school and got a really good grade on a test, it made him feel good, made him feel powerful... made him feel that he had the potential to do anything he set out to do. I've felt like that in my life, many times, but in all the answers to THE question I've had in my life (what do you want to BE when you grow up?) the most consistent answer has been: I want to be a writer. Yet every time I sit down to write, I stutter along for a while, but I eventually abandon every plotline I come up with as too formulaic or too generic or too derivative of everything else out there. My friend Pat (I would like to call her my friend) has written a novel so powerful, so life-changing for her, that Putnam has put this novel's title on the cover of their spring catalog as an example of the finest they have to offer for this season. That is awe-inspiring; that is the example that I'd like to follow. Yet not everyone can be the Great American Novelist. I don't want to win a Pulitzer; I'd just like to be able to write a book good enough to get published. My problem is, I'm a perfectionist AND a procrastinator, which is a combination guaranteed to ensure I'll probably never finish a book, much less sell one.
And yet... and yet... watching this movie tonight made me want to keep trying. Chris Gardner eventually sold his share of his brokerage firm as part of a multi-million-dollar deal, and yet at the time he was pursuing his internship at Dean Witter (his uncompensated internship) he was so poverty-stricken he was sleeping in homeless shelters with his son every night. His life is like a graph charting the course to success. It CAN be done.
And so here I am, in front of the computer, facing Microsoft's Helpful Assistant Paperclip blinking at me.... trying again.
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3 comments:
You ARE a writer and you have the novel in you. Here I am giving you advise that you didn't ask for (which I try never to do, but I can't help it in this case).
I think you have a book in you waiting to come out. Its stuck inside because you are trying too hard to make it "just right" as it comes out. Just start writing without even caring how it sounds and then edit the heck out of it later.
Do you know what its about? Even if you don't maybe just starting it will help.
I always wanted to write too so I read every book on writing and even had a writing coach for a while (just informally) and I finally realized I am not suppose to write a novel. But I bet you are!
Don't give up your dream! Find a way to fight the writer's block!
oops, forgot to say Happy Mother's Day!
So here's the deal.
For a moment, let's put the novel aside.
You're so lucky you have that check. Now, this allows you few luxuries, but it does assure you a roof over your head and the time to write short stories and articles, then submit them to magazines. REALLY. Spend some time in the bookstore and just go through magazines. See which ones your experiences would be suited for.
It won't bring in much, you'll get a stack of rejections BUT consider it part of the learning process.
Volunteer to write articles for your local paper. For newsletters at schools, the library... anywhere that could use a good writer.
So what I'm saying is don't ignore opportunities in your community. All these little things add up to experience. Or one more credit for your cv.
And the truth of it is, most people can't make their living as writers. Take, for instance, Steve Berry who has written several novels that were best sellers. He has some whopping mistakes in his novels, but he keeps going. AND he hasn't given up his day job, which is as an attorney. Same with Scott Turow. He's a critically acclaimed author and he still works as a lawyer as well.
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